Jennifer Garner went out for a stroll with her two girls in New York the other day. I wish I could say that I ran into her. I also wish that Cool Baby would stop waking Cool Newbie up from his naps. But seeing this article on Jennifer made me wonder if I’m still cool now that I have two kids. Let’s see –
1. THE LOOK
JG can wear an LBD that short because she has a nanny to help her out. If you’re by yourself and you’re always bending over to help the kids, you’ll earn a bad reputation on the playground. That’s why I often opt for the black nursing tanktop and maternity jorts. [-5 cool points] At least I was cool enough to wear a similar LBD on a date night when I was 9 mos pregnant.
2. THE STROLLER
JG’s three-wheeled stroller, Bob, could easily be friends with my Phil & Ted. [+2 cool points]
3. ENTOURAGE
JG’s entourage includes Victor Garber, an award-winning television, movie, and theater actor that played her father in Alias. Perhaps because some guy named Ben Affleck couldn’t make it that day. My entourage includes, um…Cool Dad? [-3 cool points]
NET CHANGE: -6 COOL POINTS
I’ll point out that Jennifer Garner has a little more experience because her kids are older. My only excuse is that I’ve only been a mom of two for six weeks, so sometimes I sacrifice cool points for the sake of just getting by.
***UPDATE 7/25: I went to church today with my infant and toddler, without Cool Dad or any kind of entourage, and wore a different little black dress! I did it! A couple of close calls with Cool Baby about to lift my dress. Other than that, I was okay!
Last week, Cool Baby and I went to a friend’s house and he was amazed by their unsocial cat. At one point, the cat wandered into the bathroom and CB followed. After a minute, I started worrying about how CB was tormenting the poor kitty. I guess I didn’t have to worry because he ran out and said, “That cat gave me a high five!”
CB is a positive thinker, but I don’t think kitty was happy to see him.
Have you ever had kid vs. pet problems in your home?
Cool Mum hopes to stay as cool as Cool Great-Grandma
The big day is approaching. Unfortunately. I’m at the waddling stage of pregnancy and our budget is limited. I face two options.
1. Accept the reality of being older and go (by myself) to all of the NYC places that I’ll never visit if I keep waiting for another interested person to come along. That would mean spending a day at the Tenement Museum (Cool Dad asks, “Why go there? We have first-hand experience living in one.”), the WTC visitor center, and the Museum of the City of New York.
2. Deny the reality of being older by doing something only a person in their 20’s would be likely to do. I haven’t quite figured that part out yet. This option could be fun, but also sad and uncool due to the rather large belly and limited physical capabilities.
A long time ago, back in Florida, Cool Dad turned 30 to the tune of Dark Latin Groove and 30 of his closest friends in a reserved restaurant with dance floor. He even had a “30 Years of Eric” tribute, with one dance song from each year of his life. I don’t like the spotlight, so I’m not wishing for that kind of thing, but so far my plans seem pretty lackluster, don’t you think?
So…what did you do or what do you plan to do to celebrate your 30th birthday?
It was date night and we got a little sidetracked on the way from the subway to our dinner reservation. Not one member of the Cool Fam has been known to resist a spontaneous dance party. [-5 cool points]
I have analyzed the situation and found quite a few good things about being pregnant in NYC as opposed to more suburban locations. Sure, there are some bad things, but the good things are pretty darn good.
1. You can theoretically walk anywhere you need to go for the entire 9 months, avoiding other vomit-inducing transportation options. So long, in-car barf buckets!
2. You are never more than half a block away from a street-corner trash can, just in case. In addition, shoebox-sized apartments increase the odds of dropping Chuck off at the Superbowl on time.
4. An inexpensive foot massage and pedicure is literally around the corner.
5. Midnight cravings? Any food imaginable can be delivered within minutes.
6. By third trimester, almost guaranteed a seat on any crowded bus or train (one would hope).
7. The satisfaction of knowing that your child will always be cool due to having “New York City” on their birth certificate.
8. You have the world’s best excuse to get an expensive stroller–it will be your car. And last I checked, they are still cheaper than cars. Slightly.
9. Have your chance at the clichéd “I gave birth in a taxi cab” story. On second thought, just walk to the delivery room.
photo: Ed Yourdon
