It’s probably my regular diet of A-Team, Superman, Knight Rider, Dynasty (not really), and Star Wars as a child, but when I’m out somewhere, I often imagine whatever’s happening as a TV show or movie.

Thursday, I was waiting at the oral surgeon’s office and Whitney Houston’s “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” was playing. I love that song (no shame), but it was odd to hear in a medical office. A little too upbeat. I then noticed that the other two patrons in the waiting room were African-American.

Then it kicked in. I pictured a scene on a sketch comedy show: A doctor’s office plays music that they think patients would like because of their race. Of course, this is highly inappropriate in a Michael Scott kind of way.

The next song comes on: Alicia Keys’ “No One“. Soon after, in walks an African-American couple. Hmm, this is getting interesting.

I’m amusing myself at the scene when my fun appears to be over. Paul Simon’s “Kodachrome” starts jangling on the radio. I’m thinking this song’s pretty white. Oh well.

But then, out of the back, emerges a white lady and her daughter! The scene goes on!

A young white couple comes through the door toward the end of “Kodachrome”. What’s next? “A Thousand Miles“? “In Da Club”? And then that sweet guitar riff begins.

“True” by Spandau Ballet! 4 out of 4. This office knows its stuff!

I try to text the songs into my phone to remember them, but my battery’s shot. I had to preserve this tale for future generations. So I drill them into my head as I’m called to the back.

Whitney, Alicia, Kodachrome, ah hah hah haaah hah
Whitney, Alicia, Kodachrome, ah hah hah haaah hah
Whitney, Alicia, Kodachrome, ah hah hah haaah hah

So I needed Google for the name and artist of “True”. Michael Scott would agree: Just because you don’t know who sings a song doesn’t mean you can’t stereotype it!

aaaaand CUT!

(photo: Libertinus)

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